Sunday, December 28, 2014

Worries

All parents worry about their children, or I assume they do.   Some may seem like minor worries and some major but they are still valid.   I find myself worrying about things that other parents may not worry about.

What events could be a potential trigger for  a meltdown,tantrum or some other event?  We don't know what junior's past was and we will never know all the details.  

Is he going to sabotage a big event?  That may seem strange to some but it isn't uncommon for kids to un-intentionally or intentionally to sabotage a big event like a holiday or vacation.  This is partially tied to the first item as there may be memories tied to a holiday or they don't know what to expect from a vacation.

I have been on pins and needles leading up to Christmas and our vacation.   We decided to wait until Christmas Eve to tell junior we were going on vacation.  Partially to minimize the waiting and partially because we didn't know how he would react.   Without knowing we were travelling, he has been saying every time I talk about my travels that he is afraid of flying.    I was expecting the worst for the flight but everything went smoothly.   We got through the airport and to San Diego with no issues.   Junior seems to be enjoying it and wants to stay here until next Christmas, so maybe the worries were for nothing.  The vacation isn't over yet and we still have 2 big events planned so there is still time for things to go wrong but I am optimistic that it will all go smoothly.

Why is he worried about us dying?  This is a relatively new thing with junior asking us if we will still be alive when he is a teenager and what will happen to him if we die.  For me this is a tough thing to answer as I don't necessarily want to make promises that we can't keep.  Last night I asked him why he was worried about this.  His answer "because I want to stay with you forever."  

What are other people thinking? There is often some event that results in junior running away or screaming at us in public.   Typically when it is time to leave some place there is frequently shouts of 'I'm not going' and 'You can't make me' followed by him actually running away, screaming kicking,and crying.   I always wonder if other people are thinking "What is wrong with those parents that they can't control their child."

I know we are doing the best we can but I don't think the worries will ever diminish we will just start worrying about larger problems.



1 comment:

Christine Shaaban said...

Clearly some worries are unique to your situation but some are worries we all have.
For the latter two: Samira told me that should I die she will kill herself as she cannot live without me. No pressure then.
And we all have to face the defiance in public and I just ignore all other people and concentrate on my problem. You cannot let what other people might think interfere with your parenting as the alternative would be some unreasonable bribing to make the child quiet. And in most cases people do understand (and if they don't, screw'em)